Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

It's hard to explain when you think you have endured pain and sadness and you come to realize, on a day like this, on this day, that today you experience the guilt and the sadness you will probably bare the rest of your life.
Now I understand the true meaning of letting go, and how hard it is to do so.
Maybe it's too early. Maybe time will tell. Maybe the pain is still too raw to judge its longevity. But in the glimpse of a moment I feel that i can see eternity, and this eternity carries the pain i feel, the memory of it and the guilt. I am so sorry. I feel like i betrayed myself. I feel like it's my fault.

Now has come one of the most crucial moments of my entire life : i have to forgive myself. I have to learn to forgive myself everyday, every time i think about this.

I am so sorry.

I will love you forever.

Even though we never really met.

I will carry you in my heart forever.